Archive

Posts Tagged ‘Satire’

Bloomberg Passing Off Friday Funny As News

October 5th, 2018 3 comments

As usual, sensational claims, unattributed allegations like “Chinese military putting God-chip in electronics thru Chinese foundries”, invariably surface late Friday afternoons, so no one can question their veracity. And after swirling around unchallenged over the weekend, it’s The Truth come Monday. Here’s the report from Bloomberg:

Chinese government and major electronics manufacturers, are willing to compromise it’s profitable foundry business to put God-chip everywhere to spy on everyone in America

Correct me if I’m wrong, didn’t our media collectively poopoo’d China’s chip industry capability just few months ago, including Bloomberg?

After decades of failure and mistakes galore, China is finally cranking out commoditized stuff nobody touch anymore

Pray tell, how can piss poor Chinese chip makers make God-chip with all kinds of capabilities smaller than pencil tip? It’s one way or the other Bloomberg.

But NOOOOO, that is not the tip off this story is BS – IMO it’s the article’s first paragraph referencing HBO sitcom Silicon Valley’s Middle-out Compression Technology:


Lastly, despite of Bloomberg’s justification of providing anonymity, it is still illegal to disseminate classified information anonymously, according 18 U.S. Code § 798 – Disclosure of classified information.

Opinion: China’s Acquisition of Smithfield Is A National Security Threat To America

May 30th, 2013 5 comments

[Please note this OpEd does not reflect the opinion of Hidden Harmonies, or even the author. It is a summarized survey of media coverage and netter comments in America.]

After getting their communist hands caught in the cookie jar with cyber espionage and covert theft of our technology and IP, the sneaky Communist Chinese are shifting tactics and resorting to overt acquisition of our safe, efficient pig husbandry and processing technologies to save their crumbling communist pork industry rife with disease, contamination, poison, censorship, lack of freedom.

They have to be stopped. Write to your congressman, boycott Communist-China-made products and turncoats who sell out to the communists. Burn all your possessions contaminated with Communist-China-made parts, like you and your neighbor’s cars (especially if they are ChiComs.) The evil Communist Chinese even force-feed Tibetan babies rotten pork (Tibetans abstain from pork as muslins) while wrapping them in flea blankets infested with smallpox.

Communist China is evil, we are great, USA, USA, USA…

Signed,

Freedom loving, patriotic but not nationalistic, America

The Mystery of Stupidity

April 29th, 2013 2 comments

STUPIDITY, a formidable globalised trend, is gaining momentum. Living in Hong Kong, I can feel its pressure wave on my face each morning I wake up. This 21st century bliss seems a Darwinian mystery at first. 

Idiot genes don’t serve any obvious evolutionary purpose, yet are present in prodigious abundance. How did that happen, I wonder? Perhaps people supported imbeciles because they’re cute, or pathetic enough for charity? After all, plenty of garbage DNA, such as those that make pooches, are bred for their adorably lack of intelligence. 

Unfortunately, both conjectures don’t stand up to observation.  Read more…

[Unit] 61398, The New Number of The Beast

February 26th, 2013 16 comments

Earlier Black Phoenix wrote about the problem with Mandiant attributing the Comment Crew hacking to the Chinese military. The recent media frenzy around yet another “China hacking” story focused on a supposedly shadowy PLA military unit in Shanghai, Unit 61398, as the “state actor” behind the cyber attacks. Their primary source, Mandiant APT1 report, even cited the address of Unit 61398 central office as 208 Datong Road in Gaochao, Pudong.

Only problem is 208 Datong Raod is the address of a kindergarden run by the not-so-secret military unit, and is open to the public:

Star Baby review

– Here’s Star Baby, a preschool ratings site, giving Unit 61298 Preschool a favorable review:

http://www.starbaby.cn/jigou/1368-jieshao

– Here’s another preschool review site with photos of the potential “hackers”:

http://www.studyget.com/youeryuan/item-660.html

– No, this is not a picture of PLA hackers using children as human shields. The kindergarden was practicing emergency preparedness, probably in response to a school attack that occurred in China:

http://www.pudong-edu.sh.cn/web/pd/45322-450000032148.htm

Having never been to the place, I would conceed the nursery school COULD be a front for China’s premier cyber espionage center – saved the fact the school’s online registration information shows it is one of the schools in Pudong that accepts foreign families.

I hope cooler heads prevail. While it is reasonable to believe the Chinese probably is doing everything we’re doing, to pin this on the Chinese military requires more compelling evidence than bunch of toddlers running around.

(Letter) Cramer Is Bullish on China

January 15th, 2009 31 comments

No, not Cosmo Cramer. Jim Cramer of CNBC`s Mad Money fame tonight made Xinhua China 25 his [China] Play of The Day, and expressed his bullish confidence in China`s dictatorship.

This is while self-appointed expat China experts are making doom-and-gloom, Panarin-esq predictions that China will suffer fatal crisis or fall from revolution, from range of issues: unemployment, to porn sweep, to an essay few have read.

Please allow me to add one more possibility – PETA will take China down (Pamala Anderson will let y`all know when to get out of Dodge).

Cramer bullish on China

(Letter) Boohoo, "Laserdusche" Got Busted In Bejing For Protest (嗚嗚, "雷射B" 奧運抗議被抓)

September 13th, 2008 1 comment

[Sorry my Chinese is not good, but just had to share this with the Chinese readers.] Read more…

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(Letter) Fakery Filled Closing Ceremoney A Fitting Finish

August 25th, 2008 43 comments

Just watched the closing ceremoney, allow me to head off any potential criticisms:

– During the flag raising the 56 fake ethinic children are now being faked by 56 grown ups (I’m sure those children didn’t grow up in 2 weeks.) No doubt they are all Han (except a close up on a woman who appears to be ethinic, possibly CGI enhanced?) And they were again fake singing, no doubt using 56 other people’s voices.

– The king of the drums was not flying, rather hanging on wires – just like the moon goddess during the opening ceremoney.

– The perfectly synchronized fireworks aerial must be CGI. No doubt about it.

– The entire dance number was pirated from Circ De Sole, down to those giant drums that didn’t make a sound when the soundtrack was misqued (no doubt the drum sound were from a different drum, how cruel it is to the unseen drum.)

Did I miss anything?

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(Letter) Chinese Men's Weightlifting Champion Was A Girl

August 19th, 2008 58 comments

You think after the underage gymnasts allegation, lip syncing, Han children dressed as minority, and modern warriors pretending to be ancient warriors at the opening ceremony, China’s Olympic woes can’t get any worse – think again. Read more…

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(Letter) 50 Cent Commentators Fueling More Protest?

July 23rd, 2008 7 comments

Commentators paid by the Chinese government to influence public opinion on-line may have fueled the latest protest against Fox, says an insider at one Blog site. Rumors of Fox News anti-black message traveled quickly across the Internet, and has even garnered attention from celeberities.

According the this source, after the alleged success of inciting a major incident over CNN’s Jack Cafferty, there may have been a number of cases where the Fifty Cent Party also lit the fire on Fox News protest.